Oct 2011

The Road to Daybreak
A Spiritual Journey

by Henri J M Nouwen

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The Consolation of Mary

My prayer life has been quite difficult lately. During my morning meditation I think about a thousand things except God and God's presence in my life. I am worrying, brooding, and agonizing, but not really praying.

To my surprise the only prayer that offers me some peace and consolation is the prayer to Mary. My meditation on the Annunciation brought me real peace and joy, while reflections on other mysteries could not keep me focused. As I tried to simply be with Mary and listen to her words, "You see before you the Lord's servant; let it happen to me as you have said" (Luke 1:38), I discovered a restful peace. Instead of thinking about these words and trying to understand them, I just listened to them being spoken for me.

Mary is so open, so free, so trusting. She is completely willing to hear words that go far beyond her own comprehension. She knows that the words spoken to her by the angel come from God. She seeks clarification, but she does not question their authority. She senses that the message of Gabriel will radically interrupt her life, and she is afraid, but she does not withdraw. When she hears the words "You will bear a son ... he will be called the son of the most high," she asks, "But how can this come about, since I have no knowledge of man?" Then she hears what no other human being ever heard: "The Holy Spirit will come upon you and the power of the Most High will cover you with its shadow." She responded with a complete surrender and thus became not only the mother of Jesus but also the mother of all who believe in him. "... let it happen to me as you have said" (Luke 1:34-35,38).

I keep listening to these words as words that summarize the deepest possible response to God's loving action within us. God wants to let the Holy Spirit guide our lives, but are we prepared to let it happen? Just being with Mary and the angel and hearing their words - words which changed the course of history - bring me peace and rest.

I shared this experience with Pere Andre this morning. He said, "Just stay there. Stay with Mary. Trust that she will show you the way. Do not move on as long as you find peace and rest with her. It is clear that she wants your attention. Give it to her, and you will soon understand why it is you are so distracted."

Simple, good, and consoling advice. I do not have to move faster than I can. I have received permission to stay in the place where I am consoled. It is the place where Mary says "Yes" to God's love.


Doing and Being

Peter left today. He felt increasingly at ease as he came to know the community. I wished he could have stayed longer. It seemed that he twelve days he was here were not enough to finish all the work, meet all the people, and see all the sights. But I am grateful he came. He now has an idea of life at L'Arche here in Trosly. It will certainly help us a lot in our work together in the year ahead. He can now visualize the situation in which I live, recognize the names of persons about whom I write, and explain to those who come to see him in Cambridge hoe L'Arche lives and works in France. The more than six hundred photographs he made while here will certainly be helpful in telling the story.

I am a little sad that we had so little time to just be together. There always seemed to be something that needed to be done. Even here, in this quiet, sleepy village, time seems to fly. Friendship is such a holy gift, but we give it so little attention. It is so easy to let what needs to be done take priority over what needs to be lived. Friendship is more important thatn the work we do together. Both Peter and I know and feel that, but we still don't live it very well.

As the train rolled away from the station, I thought, "He should come back and stay longer, have more time to pray, talk, and just waste time." But I know that I, too, must become a different person to make that happen.

Certainly our time together has deepened our bond and strengthened our love for each other. It is a love that grows by forgiving each other constantly for not yet being who we want to be for each other.



- To Be Continued -



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