Sep 2016

The Road to Daybreak
A Spiritual Journey

by Henri J M Nouwen

(Continue from)
A Hard but Blessed Vocation - Thinking Together about the Future  

Early this morning I flew to Toronto, where Sue Mosteller welcomed me and drove me to Daybreak in Richmond Hill.

I have been looking forward to my days at Daybreak because it is going to be my home for at least three years. I now feel ready to accept a new responsibility. During the past few months so many different things have been happening in my life that I have hardly had the time or energy to think about my future life and work at Daybread; but now that seems the only important thing.

At 2.30pm the Daybreak council invited me to tell them about my own spiritual journey and reasons for accepting their call to come to Canada and be their pastor. After having tried to express to them as best I could my own sense of being called away from Harvard and being called to a life with handicapped people and their assistants, they told me about the way they had been thinking about my future presence at Daybreak.

Five aspects arose: (1) I have a lot to learn. I have never really lived in comunity or close to handicapped people. It will not be easy to enter into this small world after having moved around so much in the big world. Therefore, I will need a good period to become a true part of the life here. (2) Together we need to develop a rich spiritual life that allows us to celebrate the liturgical year, broaden our knowledge of the scriptures, and deepen our prayer life. (3) One of my main tasks will be to help start "The Dayspring," a small spiritual centre that can be a source of renewal for English-speaking L'Arche members and their friends. (4) I should continue writing. This will not be easy, since there are so many things that will compete for my attention. But the community will not only honour, but also protect and support my vocation to write. (5) Then there will be the letters, the phone calls, the speaking engagements, and so on. It is a blessing to know that Connie Ellis is available to assist me in this work.

As we talked, I had the distinct feeling that it will not be easy to be here, but also that I will not be alone in my struggle. I thought, "It is going to be hard but blessed. I am called to this place of weak and broken people. It is a call coming from God and God's people. Do not worry, just move into it and trust that you will find what your heart most desires." Daybreak is not a place of power. It is not a smooth operation in which efficiency and control are priorities. On the contrary, it is a fellowship of the weak, in which nothing is fully together and everything has a somewhat tentative quality. I can see how frustrating this can be for me, considering my desire to get things done, and done quickly. But I trust that the slow and inefficient way of life at Daybreak will teach me something new about God's love that has remained unknown to me so far.



- To Be Continued -



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